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We all had on occasion negative thoughts;; It’s part of the nature and the way our brains work. However, when these types of ideas are very common, they can affect our work and personal lives. For something, the saying goes, “There is no worse enemy than yourself.” Just as a positive attitude can lead us to achieve goals, a negative attitude can self-destruct.
What to do when you have a bad thought The first option is usually to put the thought aside and ignore it like it never happened. The psychologist Shannon Kolakowski, author of the book Why is Depression Harming Your Relationship?Remember that we shouldn’t fear them.
She advocates that these ideas should not be suppressed or avoided when thinking about things like “I will be alone forever” or “I’m not good enough to get on the company” because doing so will encourage you to become stronger or more persuasive because they are too feared. It’s like they’re fleeing from a terrible truth.
The best way to configure your relationship with your thoughts is through acceptance and attachment therapy (Acceptance and attachment therapy, ACT, for its acronym in English). And what do you mean? Because thoughts have to be fragmented to be recognized, but at the same time they have to be explored and analyzed in order to finally have control over them.
“Diffusion is the process of noticing a negative or fearful thought and reacting to it with openness and curiosity, as if you were a distant observer,” explained Kolakowski Forbes. “Instead of accepting it as the absolute truth, acknowledge that thoughts will come and go, but you don’t have to believe them or act on them.”
Rather, the psychologist suggests fragmenting and analyzing them. If you have a thought like, “I’m not good enough for this job,” you need to investigate the cause of the idea. Maybe it’s because another coworker received a raise or a promotion. But you need to be aware that this has nothing to do with you. Maybe that person just had more time in the company or more experience. So you have to think that if you have a better idea of the company, the promotions or raises could be for us too.
Knowing ourselves can involve some negativity. The most important thing is not to get rid of it, but to change the way we react to its existence. “Establishing a new relationship with our thoughts is liberating. You can’t control what thoughts come to mind, but you can control how you react to them, and so you can control the actions you take.
At work, you can choose to be on time, focus on your productivity, be more purposeful and creative, which will safely get you to the place you want to be (the promotion or promotion) rather than becoming worthless feel. Everything is in the setting. So the next time you have a negative thought, you already know how to fight it and eventually reverse it.
* With information from Forbes.