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5 steps to negotiate like the big boys

July 31, 2020

Read for 8 min

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5 steps to negotiate like the big boys5 steps to negotiate like the big boys

He Art of negotiation It is not just for business people. We all have to negotiate every day, in our house, in our work and in our projects.

It is important to recognize that everyone can contribute at every negotiation and therefore no one has all the cards. If someone had full power, a negotiation would not be necessary, the transaction would simply be carried out unilaterally; by force or by force.

When you are at a negotiating table with a customer, supplier, partner, or potential employer, they both have something that the other person wants. To complete this process, here are five useful tips:

1. Establish a relationship


The secret of the negotiation is relationships. A great negotiator is not the one who “always finds his way”, but the one who is able to build long-term relationships based on his reputation and prestige. If “this” negotiation does not go the way he wants, the doors will always remain open for new opportunities and future business.

So spend time building this relationship and learn to ask and hear about the personality and needs of the other person. Eye! It’s not about wasting time talking meaninglessly, but about creating a real emotional bond with the other person and establishing the nature of the relationship between them. Are you an expert, are you a friend, are you a partner, are you the competition? Regardless of the nature of the relationship, it must be based on persistent moral authority: the foundation of trust.

If the relationship does not exist, communication is not possible. On the contrary, if we can be “on the same team”, things will go a lot better.

2. Choose your strategy

Image: Startaê Team via Unsplash

Once the relationship is established, you need to choose a strategy that depends on the personality of the parties, the goals you want, and the secondary variables: times, quantities, and guarantees.

Strategy means, what kind of character did you choose for this negotiation? Sometimes we can win by being kind; be more aggressive other times. Sometimes you have to know how to push; Sometimes silence is more effective.

It is not possible to implement this strategy without the first step, since practically every person is different and there is no strategy that works in all cases, especially if our goal is a long-term strategy.

Set your own limits before you start and force yourself to follow them. During negotiations, we can get nervous, excited, or worried about what can tarnish our judgment. Set your minimum and maximum price. Your options; Your trading range and what you’re willing to give up. If not, get ready for the “hangover” the next day.

3. Find the underlying desire

Image: Saad Chaudhry on Unsplash

Everyone wants something, but they don’t always tell us what they want. Sometimes they don’t even know it themselves. For example, someone can say that they want a late model car; In reality, however, they look for confirmation and feel younger. Someone may say they want to buy oranges; But what you’re looking for is to start a healthier lifestyle.

Questions, listening and openness to opportunities enable you to “think outside the box” and offer alternatives that are convenient for you and that can also satisfy the other party. Even if two people claim to be looking for the same thing, “win-win” is possible if we take care of the underlying desire and not just the express desire.

Starting from “positions” is a sure way to end a negotiation badly. Instead, we have to start from a relationship and look for a solution to a common problem.

4. Control your stomach


Can you be the adult in the room We all make mistakes when we negotiate, but in my experience, the pressure (self-imposed) is most common to make the deal, which means that we say more than we should, promise more than we can, or make too many concessions. It also makes us feel too excited, too interested, or convinced before we come at the right time.

You will rarely be in a life or death situation! A very successful friend of mine in real estate projects once taught me: take the pressure to win this time: this is not your only option. There is always a different country, a different house, a different business. Don’t despair! Paradoxically, it helps you push less to earn more because it weakens the other person’s posture at the table. Control your stomach, dominate the negotiation.

5. Respect the times


There are three bad businesses in life: buy in a hurry, sell in a hurry, and marry in a hurry. The traditional maxim of the seller “close, close, close!” May cause you to make mistakes, give up too much, or alienate the other party.

Bargaining, like chess, is a game of human strategy and technology. In chess we will rarely win in two moves. Instead, of course, times have to run out.

Never let yourself be pressured to make a decision. Your intuition and intelligence must match to make a final decision. If the other person is in a hurry, you can try to make a quick decision, but never before you have all the items on hand.

Instead, be the one who usually slows down the conversation. Ask, ask for more information; Make a counter offer. You will rarely be in a life or death situation! Practice the virtue of prudence and let time play in your favor.

This does not mean “waiting for waiting” or wasting time. If you have a great opportunity in your hands, act soon; but be careful with things that seem “too good to be true”. Usually they are. If possible, let the decision rest for a few hours: the next morning, almost everything looks different.

Did you win or lose?

Not all negotiations will end the way you want them to. This does not mean that you have “lost”, but simply that it was not the right time for this project or business. Sometimes it is better to get off the negotiating table or look for new options. Sometimes we don’t get what we want and then we find that it was really the best.

In the long run, it is much more important to build a project and a lasting reputation. The “business people” who crush, press, rape and put pressure on everyone will soon find themselves alone, without partners and without prospects.

Act with a view to the future and take decisive steps towards your long-term vision and goals! And above all, that no negotiation leads to you ignoring your principles, your values ​​and your own character. There is no business worth it.

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