The opinions of the employees of You are personal.
- Are people happy when you arrive or when you leave a place?
- We’ll tell you how to tell if you have certain habits that just make other people leave and how to get rid of them forever.
- There are ways to counteract pessimism. Find them and change your conversation.
There are certain habits that just make other people leave. As the saying goes, we all have something good to offer. However, we all have traits that can annoy others. Are people happy when you arrive or when you leave a place?
There are terrible properties here that drive people away. We’ll tell you how to know if you have them and how to get rid of them forever.
1. You are negative
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We were all close to these people. They complain and complain, they talk about how wrong their life is and they want to tell you all the details of their unhappiness.
How do you know if you are so depressing? Pay close attention to your favorite topics of conversation. Are complaints about traffic or weather the first thing you talk about in the morning? Do you tell everyone how bad you slept or how bad you feel at work?
If complaints are the constant topic of conversation, you are a little pessimistic. Notice how you start conversations with your co-workers. Another sign that you are like this is when people see you and sigh, or when they first ask you what is wrong in your life right now.
How can I stop? This habit is one of the simplest and most complicated at the same time. The easy part is all you have to do is stop talking about things that are depressed. Try to notice good things every time you have something to complain about. If you get stuck in a traffic jam, check out the beautiful things on the road and talk to your colleagues about them.
There are ways to counteract pessimism. Find them and change your conversation.
2. You don’t stop talking
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Have you ever been with someone who won’t shut up? Maybe it was a boss, a colleague, or even a passenger on an airplane. It can feel like you are lost in the ocean watching a huge wave approach at full speed to wash you away. You take a deep breath and nod and smile as you support the other person’s conversation.
How do you know if you are the ocean choking others? A good sign that you are not stopping to talk is to notice how many breaths you are taking during a conversation.
Another clear sign is that people stand up when they speak to you, a clear body language sign showing a desire not to spend more than the necessary amount of time talking. See if you dominate most of the conversation in your daily conversations.
The solution is simple: stop talking. You can start by listening more to what others have to say and taking turns speaking in meetings. Pay attention to the opinions of others. Try to count to three in your head before you start speaking and make sure not to drown out other voices in your conversations.
A little practice will help you break this annoying habit and make friends.
3. You are distracted
We all have important things to do, but one of the most annoying habits is spending your time checking your phone during a meeting or business dinner.
How do you know if it’s your case? It’s simple: write down the times when you ask what is being talked about as this is a great sign that you are not paying attention to others. Have you ever looked up during a meeting or meeting to find that no one else is on their phone or laptop? If you are constantly digitally distracted, then you should try leaving your devices at home when you need to attend an important meeting.
It can be very difficult to disconnect, but you will make more human connections that are necessary for healthy and happy relationships. Forget about distractors for a while and reconnect with individuals to give them the attention they deserve.
4. You are condescending
What is more inspiring teaching or showing others that they are not at your level? Condescending is a terrible habit that drives people away.
How do you know if you are like this? Observe the people in your life and see if they are better after the meeting. Have you been someone’s teacher or mentor? Have you helped someone find skills, jobs, or improve their development? How many people would contact you if they had a problem?
Take a close look at how you treat others. Do you help them or criticize them for not doing things like you? Do you give advice that nobody asks for? If these patterns seem familiar to you, you need to change your perspective.
Instead of giving advice to everyone, only offer it when they ask for it. Stick to the topic that was asked of you and do not offer more extensive advice than necessary. Next time someone makes a mistake, try to teach rather than blame.
Patience and compassion will help you break this terrible habit.
5. You are not sincere
People know when someone is wrong. There is nothing wrong with having an opinion or perspective that most people don’t. You don’t have to pretend you think like everyone else just to fit into a group. It is better to be polite but honest than to pretend.
Most people who are insincere tend to be insecure or condescending.
There are several ways you can tell if your insincerity is due to insecurity. Do you fear that if you say no or have a different opinion, people will not like you? Do you really care what other people think of you? Are you doing your best to please everyone? The truth is that most people enjoy a healthy disagreement in order to learn other perspectives or opinions. You don’t have to be rude when showing your ideas, but it’s okay to be sincere when showing your point.
A great way to break this habit if you’re still scared of showing your perspective is to simply not express an opinion. You can start with neutral sentences like, “This is interesting,” and leave there until you are confident enough to be authentic.
The most important thing is to stop pretending to agree to something or saying yes to things that you really don’t want to do. Dare to be yourself.